Sitting on our laurels

As I halfway consider the possibility of writing something that could, one day, turn out to be the beginning of a possible ICBINF story way in the future, I’m browsing the site for my favorite quotes.

Here are my top 10:

  1. A wounded gosling incessantly screaming ‘FAFF’” (and Futter’s entire harmonica rant) (Mike)
  2. THE SOCIETY FOR THE MAKESURANCE THAT THERE ARE NO MORE CATWOMANS.” (Mike)
  3. Dickinson raised the very large shotgun to his shoulder, spat something onto the ground (Skoal, no doubt) and said, ‘Hasta la vista, deer.‘ Then he fired. He hit the deer right in the heart. There were witnesses, of course, and if anyone disputes the fact that Rob killed a deer, their IP addresses will be logged and traced.” (Mike)
  4. The biggest surprise of the day came at about 5 p.m., when Ellis uttered his first words: ‘Uh lef’ m’bo’l!’ ‘At first, we thought it was baby talk,’ CW drummer Neil Sims said. ‘Then we realized it was just Scottish.’” (PJ)
  5. ‘Me thoot I’woos seff! In’ Feen w’sin, ‘Goo, Bin! Goo!’ ‘E woos soo’eppy! Me ne’r thoot I gi’hoort! Foony thin’is, I di’t’fil no pin!’” (I’m a sucker for Ben quotes) (Britt)
  6. THOUGH I BELIEVE IN THE SOVEREIGN DIVINITY OF SATAN (OR AT LEAST THAT HE SHOULD BE SOVEREIGN), I ACTUALLY WISH TO ESTABLISH A KINGDOM FOR MYSELF! ME! DAVID PERCY HAWES!” (Mike)
  7. “‘Sorry I’m late,” apologized [Bruce] Dickinson. ‘I just finished some commentary for VH-1. Then I have to fly a plane. Then I have to quit Iron Maiden. Then I have to write a book. Then I have to perform heart surgery. Then I have to rejoin Iron Maiden. Then I have to slay a dragon. Then I have to build a nuclear reactor.’” (Britt)
  8. When asked if the cover could be seen as artistic, Wilford responded, ‘I don’t know much about art, but let’s get this straight: you tell a 16-year-old boy there’s a record cover with hooters and willies on it, and that kid ain’t gonna give a flyin’ hoot about no Norman Rockwell or Patrick Picasso. He’s gonna run off in the corner with it, or take that CD over to his girlfriend’s and Lord knows what they’ll do with it.’” (Mike)
  9. ‘So many other ‘musicians,’ such as Trent Reznor, have referred to Courtney as an opportunistic bitch. That couldn’t be further from the truth,’ affirmed Dickinson. ‘Besides, it’s genetically impossible for Trent to know anyway, so I don’t see how it concerns him.’” (Britt)
  10. ‘Yesterday I broke down and bought Herbal Essences conditioner,’ Hendrick said, holding back tears, ‘and today I’m probably going to have to eat spaghetti sauce from a jar!! I’m drinking Bud Light instead of Heineken, eating Little Debbie granola bars instead of PowerBars, and I haven’t been able to buy a pair of shoes since last Saturday! I don’t mean three days ago… I mean TEN days ago! Neil is ruining my life!’” (Mike… though Britt helped with this, I think)

(Yes, I mostly like my own stuff.)

Any items that should be in this Top 10?

4 Replies to “Sitting on our laurels”

  1. You forgot one of my favorites:
    “I finally decided that something must be terribly wrong with Merck,” Hendrick said. “In addition to that, I thought he might be dead.”
    …from the obituary story.

    It’s such a throwaway joke that I don’t think anyone ever really noticed it. But it made me laugh.

  2. I really love that entire story about Dickinson doing manly things but “This’ll blow a hole in that sumbitch” is hands down my favorite.

  3. You forgot one of my favorites:
    “I finally decided that something must be terribly wrong with Merck,” Hendrick said. “In addition to that, I thought he might be dead.”
    …from the obituary story.

    It’s such a throwaway joke that I don’t think anyone ever really noticed it. But it made me laugh.

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